My mom is an early-to-bed, early-to-rise lady. She would read a book in bed for a few minutes and then go to sleep each night, often before we went to bed. I don't know how it started, but at some point, I began to occasionally knock on her door and then go sit on the edge of her bed to say good night. She would always say, "Don't get comfortable." I would say, "I'm not comfortable."
And then we would talk for an hour.
When we go home to visit, my mom and I still do this. I would miss it terribly if we didn't. I think it was a large part of why I didn't rebel much and why I still have a very good relationship with my mom.
Now that I am a mom, I see how hard it must have been some nights to stay up and have some kernel of wisdom, but she never turned me away.
Ella isn't coming in our room yet for talks, but she almost always wants to cuddle after our nighttime ritual is complete. She'll say, "Tell me about your day" which means, "Tell me about my day." Handsome Hero and I sometimes don't have the patience. We are tired and have things to do. We haven't spent any time together and sometimes just don't want to take the time. But she won't always be wanting to cuddle. She's going to grow up and I want her to feel that she can always talk with me. Cultivating that relationship starts now, even if the subject matter doesn't seem important and we have "better" things to do. It is an investment worth making.
I want Ella to grow up wanting to "get comfortable" the way I did.