Wednesday, July 25, 2012

The Pacifier

With the third kid, you'd think we would have seen it all {for those of you farther along in the parenting journey than we are, feel free to laugh}.  After all, we have a boy and a girl with vastly different temperments and personalities.  What was there new to learn?

One word:  Pacifier.

Have you any thoughts about pacifiers?  As some of my Southern friends would ask, are ya fer 'em, or agin 'em {you have to pronounce that phonetically.  Don't worry, you'll get it}?  I never had to give this much thought.

Ella and Jack didn't use a pacifier.  Ella sucked her thumb {and stopped doing so on her own, so we never went through a struggle there}, and Jack holds his hand in a very awkward and uncomfortable-looking position and sucks his three middle fingers.  He's odd.

Nate uses a pacifier.  I'm not sure how I feel about it, but what can I do?  It's magic!  Stick that thing in his mouth and you have instant peace and quiet.  He literally looks like he's getting a fix.  It's slightly disturbing.

As I have watched Nate's reaction to the pacifier, I have realized something that could be paramount to our national security.  This could have global ramifications.  Picture it:  we send a package loaded with pacifiers to the leaders of Al qaeda, and we immediately acheive world peace.  They'd open the box, stare for a bit at the contents and look questioningly around at each other.  Then one brave soul would try one, and the others would watch as he entered a state of unimaginable bliss, and they would all clamor to try it.  As they lay down to take a nap, we'd come in and arrest them all and they would just look languidly at us, lulled by the supernatural power of the pacifier.

They're that powerful.

I am not, however, sure that I want Nate attached to one.  I've written a pro/con list for the go-fier, as my brother called it.  He's odd, too.

Pro:  He'll use it for awhile, and then when it's gone, it's definitive.  You can't throw out a thumb.  Unless you're the mafia.  Then you could do that.

Con:  I have to remember it.  I have to always have it around.  I hate that.  Remembering diapers in two sizes is hard enough.

Pro to the Con:  I could always put it on one of those little clips that attach to his clothes.

Con to the Pro to the Con:  If I have to remember those clips, too, or remember to take them off of his outfit, I might go insane.

Pro to the Con to the Pro to the Con:  I could treat it like we treated the other kids' blankies.  They were not allowed to have them at all times.  They were only allowed in places where they were confined, like the crib and carseat.

In short, since at this point I don't really have a choice, I guess I'm okay with Nate using a pacifier.  Isn't that big and mature of me? 

But I'm not going to call it a nook, or binky {what?} or go-fier or a soother, and you can't make me. 

So there.

1 comment:

  1. Carson used one religiously or 4 months then just quit. Just like that and just after I bought those so awesome clips bc we were forgetting them. We called it a nukers