Our anniversary.
Our 3rd anniversary trip to Victoria, B.C. We had just found out we were pregnant with Ella. We got there and all of the cute pants that I packed were too tight and I wore sweat pants the entire time.
Ten years. That's how long I've been married. That's how long Handsome Hero's been married, too, if you're wondering.
Ten years.
In Seattle, Spring 2008
When we first got married, we thought couples who had been married a really long time, like three years, knew everything. Couples who had been married for ten years were pros. And they were old. They usually had some gray hair and were, like, in their thirties and everything.
I now have gray hair. I am now as firmly in my thirties as you can be. I now have three children. I have joined the ranks.
I have been married ten years.
What has ten years taught me?
Our 5th anniversary at Harrison Hot Springs. It was a beautiful natural hot spring. I came back with hives. And a cute necklace.
1. I am married to an engineer.
Obvious, yes. But this breed of individual is highly unique. Spouses of engineers are giving me a big Amen, sister! right now.
Engineers don't think like normal people. I don't know that they're really human, actually. If you listen closely, you can hear thousands of wheels turning in their brains, all trying to figure out the perfect solution to one singular problem. I've listened. It's amazingly complex in there.
Handsome Hero has learned that I don't think like an engineer, much to his chagrin. He gives lots of thought to one problem. I give lots of little thoughts to many problems.
And that is why we are a perfect couple.
Our first date right after Jack was born.Obvious, again, yes. But we ladies so often try to make our men into girlfriends. We get aggravated when they don't think the way we do.
Why would my husband think like me? He's not me. He's not a woman. He's a man and thinks like one. Thinking like a man is one of the things that attracted me to him.
My husband is my provider, my protector, my hero. He is likely to decide to check the oil when we're already ten minutes late, likely to leave the tools out after a project, and likely to have the kids to bed past their bedtime.
Why?
Well, when he checks the oil, which he does to protect us, it means I don't have to. Those tools were used to complete a project on this home that he has provided us, and likely, I asked him to do it. As for the kids' bedtime, notice that he's the one putting them to bed. That's to ease my burden while I take care of Nate's last feeding. More importantly, he's not just my hero. He's the kids' hero, too. I can promise you they will have awesome memories of playing with their dad.
When I learned to recognize that Handsome Hero's manliness was not a fault, my nagging decreased by about eighty percent.
Not totally gone, but after all, I think like a girl.
Spring 2010
3. I am married to a stud.
That's right. He rocks my socks. He took my breath away the first time we met, and still does. Anyone uncomfortable here? Well, you can leave. I would like some time alone with my Handsome Hero, anyway.
Summer 2011
4. I am married to the man God has chosen for me.
God didn't have to give me such a gem. Talk about hitting the jackpot! I'm so thankful that the Lord saw fit to bless me so greatly.
Both of us were pregnant with Nate.
5. I am not married to the same man I married ten years ago.
Nor am I the same person I was ten years ago. Thank goodness! We have grown together as we have grown toward the Lord.
And we keep growing. We spent this last weekend {and we're still working on it} putting up a playset for the kids.
Does that sound like an awesome ten year anniversary to anyone else??? We're planning on going away next year when, Lord willing, Nate doesn't need the feeding tube. Eleven years is much more impressive than ten anyway. :)
This year, we are putting up a playset.
But it's fun. We function as a team now. It's a far cry from our first project together at the beginning of our marriage, when we refinished the floors in our 1930's cape cod. That, my friends, was a true test of whether we would make it to happily ever after.
I've since learned to go slowly, working patiently and not cutting corners. It's amazing how much my engineer husband has mellowed as I offer to help. I can hear those little wheels struggling against each other. Sometimes it's like a 12 step program. In fact, it's exactly like a 12 step program.
Cast in point - the Progression of the Playset.
step 1:
He worked on the playset and I had the kids.
step 2:
He worked and read the directions and told me what he needed me to fetch for him.
step 3:
I took over the directions.
step 4:
I started reading ahead, organizing screws and boards, and told him what to do as he finished each step.
step 5:
We both worked in different areas. This was huge. I was holding a drill myself!
step 6:
He checked over my work and explained what I had done wrong.
step 7:
I told him he was scary when he gets all perfectionist on me and not to be an ogre.
step 8:
Then he grinned and thanked me for helping him.
step 9:
I offered to finish some of the small stuff the next day while he was at work. He looked like he had just swallowed mineral oil, but agreed.
step 10:
I did everything up to where we needed two people. I was pretty proud of my accomplishment.
step 11:
He came home and fixed everything I had done wrong.
I was no longer proud of my accomplishment.
step 12:
Then he said that I really had been a help and there had only been one board I had screwed in backwards, and he really appreciated my efforts that allowed for us to get the roof on tonight because if I hadn't done anything, we wouldn't have gotten that done.
See? Progress! He keeps getting better.
We keep getting better.
Happy Anniversary, Handsome Hero. Let's go grayer and get older together, shall we?
